Tuesday, January 30, 2007

The Cough Drop Wars


Why didn't I have this quality item a week ago?
I have been very sick lately: crazy fevers, sore throat and a nose run amok. Ugh! Food has been the last thing on my mind, dear reader, and as a result I have neglected you. I am sorry.
Today I am on the mend and ready to chat again. But what to say? I haven't eaten anything cool, there've been no aha! observations mid-meals. I barely want coffee anymore (these are dark days).

Ahhh, but I have eaten about 4,000 cough drops! Then this is what I have to offer, especially for those beseiged by flu and cold. I've sucked down 3 different kinds of lozenges, which all claim to soothe sore throats and help you cough less. I wasn't coughing, but damn my throat hurt. So here are the results of my unscientific (but very committed) research.

  • The clear loser of the bunch is definitely the Rite Aid Honey Lemon Cough Drops. These tasted the most like scary chemicals... which ones I don't know, but ick. Each contained 8 mg of menthol which did numb my throat, but even in my miserable sick state I noted flavors much like rubber gloves.
  • The Ricola Echinacea Honey-Lemon Herb Throat Drops were by far the tastiest: the honey flavor was the cleanest and the lemon wasn't medicinal. They weren't syrupy in the mouth; at times the lozenges were a bit viscous like honey, but mostly hard candyish. They have a more round, herby quality and a lot less menthol, only 2.7 mg. They didn't numb my throat very well, but they were delicious and full of echinacea (which I believe is a magical healer... hey, I don't claim to be a scientist).
  • Lastly, I ate vast quantities of Halls Ice Blue Mentho-lyptus Drops. They contain a whopping 10 mg of menthol and pretty much freeze your windpipe, which feels odd but at least the pain is gone. When I inhaled quickly through my nose, my throat felt like I'd stepped into the snows of Poughkeepsie, NY, in the dead of winter. The flavor is weirdly medicinal also, though vaguely minty and significantly less gross than the Rite Aid drops. They turn your tongue blue, which is cool in a third grade kind of way.

So to summarize: the Ricola were tastiest, the Halls Ice Blue were most effective, and in general I'd recommend staying healthy this winter if you can. None of them taste that good.

6 comments:

Hero to the Masses said...

I, for one, enjoy the Halls citrus and the Halls cherry flavor. Neither as effective as the Ice Blue, which would make the strongest man infertile. God bless the Halls company.

Tory Davis said...

Hmmm... are you speaking from experience here Campbell? Hey, maybe we've *finally* found The Pill for men!
And I don't like cherry flavored things, unless they're cherries. That red color makes me nervous.

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